Archive for syyskuu 2013

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TS-kolumni: Ylettömän hienoa

16 syyskuun, 2013

”Yleisradiota vastaisia argumentteja on keksitty runsaasti – se vääristää kilpailua, tiedonvälitys ei ole ”riippumatonta”, siellä on liikaa ruotsinkielisiä ohjelmia, se rakentaa Musiikkitaloa, siellä on liikaa henkilökuntaa ja niin edelleen. Todellisuudessa kyse on lähinnä siitä, että yksityisten mediafirmojen näkökulmasta YLE on valtion tukema kilpailija netin kriisiin ajamilla markkinoilla.”

kolumni_ylettomanhienoa_140913(Turun Sanomat, 14.9.2013)

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Dear MR NOKIA!

3 syyskuun, 2013
(c) Nokia / Creative Commons

(c) Nokia / Creative Commons

Dear MR NOKIA!

My name is STEPHEN ELOP. I am the son of the former PRESIDENT of MICROSOFT, Mr. BILL GATES III. I am contacting you because a mutual FRIEND suggested you as a person who is trustworthy and reliable.

As you probably know, MICROSOFT’s plans for world domination have recently been foiled by the evil APPLE corporation and their IPHONE invasion of the market. However, we still have the very valuable MS WINDOWS OPERATING SYSTEM in our possession. Unfortunately, we cannot get it out on a SMARTPHONE. This is why I am writing to YOU.

The OPERATING SYSTEM is worth one hundred billion dollars ($100.000.000.000 USD). However, since it is tied to DESKTOP COMPUTERS, we cannot access any of that money. With your help we could transfer the OPERATING SYSTEM on a SMARTPHONE, and then we could share that money in the ration 50% to me, 40% to you and 10% for any expenses.

However, before we begin, there is one SMALL technicality before I can transfer the OPERATING SYSTEM to you. I need you to send me your DEVICE MANUFACTURING BUSINESS. Without this you can not get 40% of one hundred billion dollars ($100.000.000.000 USD), meaning exactly forty billion dollars ($40.000.000.000 USD)! I hope you understand.

Note that this transaction is 100% risk FREE and LEGAL. There is NO ATOM OF RISK in connection to this business as I have worked out all modalities to complete the transaction successfully. Once the DEVICE MANUFACTURING BUSINESS is released to us, the PROFITS from the OPERATING SYSTEM will be released to YOU.

Please hold what I have told YOU in strict CONFIDENCE and kindly send your response to my PRIVATE email address: stefenelope31@hotmail.com

Sincerely, AND God bless!

September 21, 2010
Stephen Elop
Son of the former President of Microsoft, Mr. Bill Gates III